Friday, May 2, 2008

Newsflash: I am white.



For about a month now, I've been a regular reader of the fantastic blog Stuff White People Like. As a white person (and therefore an authority on the subject), I enjoy how correct it is. I also enjoy the regular White People In The News feature, wherein they highlight news articles about the lives of white people. Even better - they were finally forced to exempt The New York Times from this feature, because all the news articles were coming from it. Because let's face it, The New York Times is a newspaper about white people (it's my home page).

Sometimes the blog is so spot-on it's eerie. Like the other day, when the entry about scarves was posted, and I read it while sitting at my desk, wearing a scarf. In all fairness, I would say that - outdoor scarf wearing aside - about 80 percent of the time that I'm wearing a scarf, it's because I'm cold. Folks from my last job could tell you in detail about my scarf-wearing exploits, because I sat directly underneath an air conditioning vent that regulated the office temperature, regardless of season, by blasting cold air on my head. In that situation, some people might reach for a sweater. I went for a scarf.

Also, I make scarves. So I should be allowed to wear those without feeling as though I am the whitest hipster alive. Not that that's a bad thing.

By the way, I want to throw this down right now. He's at 97 things so far - Manhattan/Brooklyn is on there, and so is San Fran. Austin has got to be coming. I swear it is. Every white person I've ever met likes Austin. Even white people who have never been here. Also knitting/crocheting is coming. Although that's sorta gender specific. But I feel like a lot of white people are getting into that these days (myself included).

I like so many things on that list of 97 things that white people like. There are some, though, that I really, really like. They include:

#1 Coffee (bonus points for making my own espresso)
#5 Farmer's Markets
#8 Barack Obama
#24 Wine
#25 David Sedaris (and bonus points for liking Amy Sedaris too)
#35 The Daily Show/Colbert Report (please note ownership of a "Stewart/Colbert '08" t-shirt)
#38 Arrested Development (theme song is my new ring tone)
#39 Netflix
#42 Sushi
#44 Public Radio
#54 Kitchen Gadgets (God I have so many)
#63 Expensive Sandwiches (I think this is just a side effect from my time in New York)
#64 Recycling (future blog post will address my obsession at length)
#83 Bad Memories of High School (can't decide if I want to go to my reunion this summer because I hated it so much)
#97 Scarves (see photo above)

Dang, I am white.

2 comments:

Amanda said...

I mean I knew I was white but...dang.
I have to own up to so many...
#97 scarves
#89 St Patrick's day
#87 Outdoor performance clothes
#84 T-shirts
#83 Hating high school
#77 Musical comedy
#71 Being the only white person around
#68 Michel Gondry
#67 Standing still at concerts
#42 Sushi
#41 Indie music
#38 Arrested Development
#35 Daily Show/Colbert Report
#31 Snowboarding
#25 David Sedaris (I just bought one of his books last night)
#19 Traveling
#13 Tea
#10 Wes Anderson movies
#9 Making you feel bad about not going outside

And Denver will be added to that list. Its inevitable.

Nicole said...

My turn! I think that I am whiter than the two of you put together.

#97 Scarves
#96 New Balance Shoes
#91 San Francisco
#88 Having Gay Friends
#84 T-Shirts
#83 Bad Memories of High School (I didn't go to my reunion for the simple fact that I really don't care what anyone from my graduating class is doing)
#81 Graduate School (Next year, I'm so there)
#78 Multilingual Children
#77 Musical Comedy
#76 Bottles of Water (only if they are resusable plastic or metal)
#74 Oscar Parties
#72 Study Abroad (I so wish I had done this)
#71 Being the only white person around
#64 Recycling
#63 Expensive Sandwiches
#61 Bicycles (if I lived any where close to work, I so would so bike/walk)
#59 Natural Medicine
#58 Japan
#57 Juno
#55 Apologies
#54 Kitchen Gadgets
#53 Dogs
#51 Living by the Water
#49 Vintage
#48 Whole Foods and Grocery Co-ops
#47 Arts Degrees
#45 Asian Fusion Food
#43 Plays
#42 Sushi
#41 Indie Music
#40 Apple Products
#39 Netflix
#29 80s Night
#26 Manhattan (now Brooklyn too!)
#25 David Sedaris
#24 Wine
#22 Having Two Last Names
#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture
#19 Traveling
#18 Awareness
#15 Yoga
#14 Having Black Friends
#13 Tea
#12 Non-Profit Organizations
#10 Wes Anderson Movies
#9 Making you feel bad about not going outside
#8 Barack Obama
#7 Diversity
#6 Organic Food
#5 Farmer’s Markets
#1 Coffee

Dallas will nver be added to this list because white people hate Dallas.